Krach Review: the “best” Fiverr Trading Bot
We set out to find the best trading bot on the interweebs and came across onfqzmpgvr’s bot on Fiverr which promises an 80% win rate, adds a nice little list of returns and a possible profit rate of 8–15% monthly. Rated at 4.9 stars this must surely work, right?
A few months ago, back when Covid-19 was just a hoax — according to a few nations’ leaders aka the smartest men in the world-I went stir crazy. My forex trades weren’t hitting their mark. It got me superfrustrated and so I decided needed a break. But how would I earn money away from my computer?
A faint whisper reached my ears.
“Passive income”.
“Of course!” I said. “If I create a trading bot to do all my trading for me, I won’t have to go through that emotional rollercoaster of trading and I won’t have to miss any opportunities. What a very novel, totally unique idea no-one has ever had!”
So I wandered along the internebula in search of a trustworthy trading bot. I could have tried to make it myself, but the idea is to work less, not more! Duh!
Along my travels I found many different vendors with many different EA’s (expert advisors), bots and algorithms, but how to trust any of them?
“I’ve got it!” I said. I quickly went to Fiverr and typed in ‘trading bot’. A long list came up. As a newbie to Fiverr I had no idea what I was in for. I skimmed through the list and read every description of every bot. One user actually actually claimed (still does) ‘30–40% monthly returns conservatively’. That’s at least 360% net profit a year! Suck on that, Jim Simons’ Medaillon fund, with your BS 40% annually net profit return rate!
Wow. 30%. Imagine that? Put in $5.000 and get a net return of $1.500 monthly. That’s enough for most people to live off of. “Just wait when this COVID-thing dies down,” I told myself. “I’ll be going for an AirBNB in Thailand in no-time. Profit off that low cost of living. Yeah!”
Even a pessimist like me was getting amped. No more sitting behind a computerscreen, waiting for two lines to cross or some candle to touch some made-up zone, maybe entering a trade after hours of staring and then failing most of the time, thanking the gods you maintain a 1:1.5 R:R, so “we’ll get ’em tomorrow, boys.” All the missed opportunities and all the negative emotions and mostly negative outcomes: gone. Just let that robot slave do all the work while you’re getting served Sex on the Beaches (I don’t like lime) by some robot waiter on a beach somewhere with a hot robot babe by my side (everything’s robots now), wearing nothing but a mask. Ahh, the life.
Reading through all the descriptions and going through lists and lists of trades, I began telling myself these bots could work. My fantasy overpowered my rationality and without any real evidence my mind tried to ‘will’ this into reality.
I’m no spring chicken though. I have been in this business a while and I’ve seen my fair share of scammers, so let’s do what I always do: talk to the people behind the bot.
I picked twenty vendors and started asking simple questions. One of them was, “What returns can I expect?” I received very different and interesting answers. Mind you, these users are supposed to be selling a bot or creating one with you, so what you want to hear is, “With a portfolio of x amount of dollars, you can expect around x % profits before fees.” Something like that.
This was what one user answered without any information (I didn’t give them an indication of my portfolio):
Much professional. Very finance. Stonks go up!
I went through all of them and was left with two: botgas and qzmpgvr. They’re both Level 2 Sellers on Fiverr (which must mean something good, right?), their scores are high, the reviews are great, and they’re both offering 8–12% monthly gains. The difference? The first one had a Telegram with real people in it and a lot of support. The second one had a cool UI with a Telegram interface showing you each trade.
The first one is priced at $400. The second at $75. I was in no way convinced of either, so I went with the cheaper option.
I set up the VPS and the bot qzmpgvr gave me. He even helped me set it all up, which was awesome. I was impressed by the look and feel of the UI, but I quickly noticed something strange in the settings. Firstly, every trade took up 15% of my portfolio. That is a lot. Too much actually. 2% is the standard. Also, the risk to reward was horrendous. Standard profit-taking would commence at a fixed rate of +1.5% while the stop-loss stood 3% below entry. I asked the seller what was up, but he told me the probability was so high, it nullifies the risk to reward. Also, he had built in a “smart exit”-functionality which would mean your profits (and your losses) could go higher (or lower). We would soon find out which one of the two was more prominent of an occurrence.
I asked if it was plug and play and the seller assured me all I’d have to do was turn on the bot and it would manage itself. So I ‘pressed the button’ and sat back.
The experience
After a day I got two Telegram notifications for trades. On the 13th of July we had an ARPA/BTC trade and a LUN/BTC trade. Both trades netted 1.5% profit each. Yay!
Then, another win.
Until THETA/BTC. That one went down 8% and annihilated all profits. “Ah, well,” I said. “Give it a few months and it’ll be okay.” I wasn’t expecting to win, but break-even would have been nice was it not for one trade actually activating the “smart stop-loss” causing me to go down 24%. Just when you think it can’t get worse than that, the bot gave an error. Couldn’t sell. I ran to my phone and logged into Binance. It seemed the BTC-pair actually disappeared from the listing on Binance during the trade which forced me to sell manually to ETH at a 73% loss.
I told the seller his bot was losing trades more than Philakone right before coming out with a new Udemy course and his answer was to turn off the bot when the market gets hit hard. “Ow, so turn it off when we’re losing and turn it on when we’re winning? Gotcha.” And here I was thinking it was plug and play. Now, how would I ever got that conclusion? Oh yeah. Because he told me!
Fiverr sidenote
For people who aren’t familiar with Fiverr: you can only give a review within a few days after receiving the goods, but not after. So at first I gave 5 stars for delivery, support, a seemingly fine product. That being said, I could not review the one true metric in that short amount of time: does it make us money? For that I had to give it a few months — far beyond the review period.
So now we understand why a lot of these bot reviews reach close to 5 stars. It’s because we aren’t judging the product. We’re judging the delivery. And that first part usually works out okay. But it’s not what consumers want. We want to be able to leave a review of a verified purchase, just like Amazon. So I reached out to Fiverr, asking them if I could change my review. They sent me their guidelines which basically means “fuck you we’re not doing shit we’re assholes but we don’t care we love only money fuck you fuck honesty”.
And it’s true. They don’t want to sell something that has 3 stars or less. Why? Because products and services that are 3 stars don’t get sold. Considering Fucker-I mean, Fiverr receives commission over every sale, they simply rigged the review functionality to make sure everyone poops out 4 to 5 stars on the delivery and hope people get swayed into buying.
Disclaimer: I’m sure it works fine for music samples and nude pics (not mine unfortunately), but not for bots. I personally can’t imagine it working for their top selling genres either, like logo design and illustrations, because truly good work takes more time than the review allotment allows. I can’t prove this and I’m completely digressing, so let’s get to the most important part.
The results
We started out on Binance with a total portfolio of $1.230 of which $330 dollars was in BTC and $900 was in USDT. To be fair we’ll compare the results in both denominations.
The amount of BTC we started out with on July 12th was 0.0288 BTC.
The amount of BTC we ended up with on October 27th was 0.0186 BTC.
The amount of USDT we started out with on July 13th was 900 USDT.
The amount of USDT we ended up with on October 27th was 551 USDT.
In 3.5 months our BTC went down 35% while our USDT amount went down 39%, leaving an average change of our portfolio at -37%.
Conclusion
The bot looks good, the seller was forthcoming and eager to help, but the one thing you want to work, doesn’t. Also, it wasn’t ‘plug and play’. It was more ‘plug and pain’ and the seller could, nay, should have been more forthcoming about that. Instead, he chose to omit both that and his claim to 8–12% monthly profits in the description of the product and keep selling a bad product. Also, fuck Fiverr.
Krach Score: 2/10
Do you own a bot that works? If so, let us know your gains, brah!
Is there a course out there that can actually make you rich? Which one?
Can you get rich by trading or is it all just a scam? Let us know in the comments!
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Krach’s (Karim Heiden) Twitter: https://twitter.com/KarimHeiden
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Disclaimer: I buy the products myself for every review and do not accept sponsorships to review any products.
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